Play-in schedule

1. Thoughts on every series, East Edition

No. 1 Cavs (64-18) vs. No. 8 Heat/Hawks

Whoever emerges victorious from the annual Heat-Hawks-Bulls play-in invitational is going to get violated by the Cavs, who are a legit juggernaut.

Also: If the Heat have the best coach, a great GM and the No. 1 market advantage in the NBA, why are they .500 every year? Why haven’t they landed a star since Jimmy Butler? Why haven’t they won anything since LeBron decided to go there? The whole Heat Culture enterprise is stale. Dead, even.

No. 2 Celtics (61-21) vs. No. 7 Magic (41-41)

Point: There is some intrigue here, in that Paolo Banchero and Franz Wagner are both healthy after missing extended time this season, giving leniency to the idea that Orlando is somewhat better than their record and seed suggests. 

Counterpoint: The Celtics are -8000 to advance. 

No. 3 Knicks (51-31) vs. No. 6 Pistons (44-38)

Knicks fans feel particularly down on this team, which appears to have a second round ceiling despite their all-in moves this offseason. 

A few names to remind those fans of where they came from, though: Allonzo Trier, Damyean Dotson, Ignas Brazdeikis, Mario Hezonja, Mindaugas Kuzminskas, etc. 

Also: This is how Mikel Bridges kept his consecutive games played streak alive. That’s kinda lame!

No. 4 Pacers (50-32) vs. No. 5 Bucks (48-34)

Giannis’ stats this year: 30.4/11.9/6.5 on 60.1% shooting.

1. We’re all taking him for granted. 

2. Apparently, Dame Lillard has made a miraculous recovery from a blood clot and might actually play this series. 

Also: The Pacers won 50 games this year after a 10-15 start. That’s a 40-17 finish. They’re pretty good. Maybe even upset-the-Cavs-in-the-second-round good. (A hedged half-prediction. We’re so back!)

2. Trivia

3. Thoughts on every series, West Edition

No. 1 Thunder (64-18) vs. No. 8 Grizzlies/Mavs 

Did you know the Thunder are the seventh team in NBA history to win 68 or more games in a season? Did you know they have the best net-rating ever? 

They’re also the youngest team in the league. The last time the youngest team in the league won the title? Never. 

SGA is 26. Chet Holmgren is 22. Jalen Williams is 24. You’d have to go back to the 1981 Celtics to find such a freshly-microwaved contender who actually won the title. 

Also: We’re eagerly waiting to see how far Ja Morant will take his weapons-themed celebrations.

No. 2 Rockets (52-30) vs. No. 7 Warriors (48-34)

If you’re a regular season flake, you might be shocked to hear the Rockets are the 2 seed in the toughest West since the mid-2010s.

Quick primer: They’ve won on defense. They’re average on offense. Their best player is probably All-Star Alperen Sengun. Their funnest player is Amen Thompson. And their most over-involved player is Fred VanVleet; get ready for 30-foot step-back air balls as the shot clock expires!

Also: GSW has Draymond Green. Houston has Dillon Brooks. So, that will be fun.

No. 3 Lakers (50-32) vs. No. 6 Timberwolves (49-33)

All 11 ESPN people picked the Lakers to advance, which is hilarious because they’re only -180 to win the series. But if the Lakers win and the Warriors win, we’ll get the sixth playoff series between Steph and LeBron. What do you think is the league’s desired outcome?

Also: Oh my god, the Lakers have Luka Doncic. 

No. 4 Nuggets (50-32) vs. No. 5 Clippers (50-32)

This series has Clippers-Spurs 2015/Bulls-Celtics 2009 potential as far as first-rounders go. Kawhi Leonard is playing as well as he has as a Clipper and, if you’re in the market for a new nerd-friendly Balkan to talk about this postseason, meet Ivica Zubac. 

Also: The Nuggets fired Michael Malone a few weeks ago and no one on the team seems sad about it. 

Also, also: Nikola Jokic became the third person to average a triple-double in NBA history this season. His take on it: “I didn't do that before. I don't know. I don't know what to say. It's good”

Quick hits

• The three players who have averaged a triple-double all did so while averaging 30-plus points. Wonder if a non-prolific scorer will ever do it?

• Ja Morant is expected to play tonight despite an injury vs. the Warriors. 

• The Phoenix Suns are a new kind of bleak. 

• Adam Silver is still debunking Luka trade conspiracies. 

• Remember former Timberwolf Nikola Pekovic? He’s a Balkan gangster now.

• Dirk is out on the Mavericks. 

• The Pistons are trying to stop Knicks fans from coming to their home games.

Reads + Pods

• NBA nicknames are getting out of control [GQ]

• Missed 3s are taking over the NBA. Where should the league draw the line? [The Ringer]

That's the buzzer.
Thanks for reading the 395th edition of The Grip.