Monday, April 15th, 2019

An NBA-obsessed newsletter for the info-craved basketball mind. Did a friend forward you this newsletter? Sign yourself up here.

Written while listening to Public Enemy's Brothers Gonna Work It Out

This is The Grip's 100th edition. Thank you for reading, or, at the very least, pretending to. We appreciate you.

Eastern Conference

 [1] Milwaukee Bucks vs. [8] Detroit Pistons  

Game One:

,

 Pistons 86

Game Two:

Pistons at Bucks, 8 p.m., Wednesday

Yikes! This game was over, real fast, but it gave us this screenshot, where Giannis almost became the first player to dunk from the free-throw line in a game. [READ: Pistons' Blake Griffin likely to miss first-round series with Bucks][READ: Blake Griffin is 'by no means Hollywood'][READ: I hope Giannis makes these cowards weep on national television]

 [2] Toronto Raptors vs. [7] Orlando Magic  

Game One: Magic 104,

 Raptors 101

Game Two:

 Magic at Raptors, 8 p.m., Tuesday

Here’s a Tweet from Saturday that was both funny, and a perfect explainer as to why it was so damn funny and unacceptable for the Raptors to lose to this Magic team: 

• Respect to the Orlando Magic for making the Let's Remember Some Guys method of roster construction work for them.

Orlando is the epitome of a roster of Some Guys. A few names: 

• D.J. Augustin

• Terrance Ross

• Michael Carter-Williams    

• Evan Fournier

• Khem Birch

Props to you if you knew Michael Carter-Williams was on the Magic. Augustin, who should receive honest credit for still being in the league, hit the game-winner and finished with 25 points. Kyle Lowry had zero points.  

 [3] Philadelphia 76ers vs. [6] Brooklyn Nets  

Game One:

, 76ers 102

Game Two:

 Nets [+8.5] at 76ers, 8 p.m., tonight

This game will, from now on, be referred to as The Thinkpiece Game. Here a few headlines we took the liberty of making up, that we hope someone actually writes. On Joel Embiid checking Amir Johnson’s phone during the game: 

• Why Embiid’s bench antics are deeper than you think

• The in-game phone check-in? Millenials killed that, too 

On Ben Simmons’ comments about 76ers fans booing during the game: 

• Why Philly fans -- not a loss or two -- are problematic

• Ben Simmons just wasn’t made for this

On Brent Brown: 

• Brent Brown was never the solution 

On team-building: 

• The Nets built their team the right way. Now, they're beating The Process. 

[READ: From Joel Embiid’s health to a cell phone incident, the Sixers open the playoffs in disarray]

 [4] Boston Celtics vs. [5] Indiana Pacers  

Game One:

, Pacers 74

Game Two:

 Pacers at Celtics, 7 p.m., Wednesday

The first game of this series was an eyesore played under the shadow of Tiger Woods’ run to the top of the Masters’ leaderboard. The Pacers, who do not have a true lead scorer without Victor Oladipo, scored eight points in the third quarter and 21 in the fourth.In the regular season, without their All-Star, the Pacers were a cute story. In the playoffs, they’ll be a short story. The real Celtics-related triumph is the most recent edition of The Woj Pod, which Kendrick Perkins went on and absolutely killed. Give it a listen here.Some quick highlights: Rondo was ready to retire when Perk got traded Kevin Garnett almost killed Lucky the Leprechaun after he tried to eat pregame before the players Perk wants to coach Perk wants Kevin Durant to go to Washington, but knows he won't[READ: The only real opponent the Celtics have in this series is themselves]

Western Conference

[1] Golden State Warriors vs. [8] LA Clippers

Game One:

 , Clippers 104

Game Two:

 Clippers [+8.5] at Warriors, 10:30 p.m., tonight

The irony here for Doc Rivers and this No. 1 vs. No. 8 matchup, which is the most lopsided series since 1988, according to Vegas, is that he’d been pining for the matchup since 2015. That was three stars and one era ago, and no one knows that better than him. The shame here for Los Angeles is that it had a pretty awesome season, and improved despite the Tobias Harris trade; had the Clippers won another game and faced the Nuggets or Trail Blazers, things could have gotten interesting. This series, of course, will not be interesting, sans Patrick Beverely’s ongoing attempt at coaxing Kevin Durant into a mental breakdown. [READ: The beef between Kevin Durant and Patrick Beverley will make this inevitable Warriors sweep fun as hell]

[2] Denver Nuggets vs. [7] San Antonio Spurs

Game One:

, Nuggets 96

Game Two:

 Spurs at Nuggets, 9 p.m., Tuesday

There is nothing in this world more Spurs than a guy named Derrick White, who played three years of NCAA Division II college basketball -- in Colorado, no less -- returning to Denver as part of a heavy underdog to egregiously posterize Paul Millsap, the $90 million prize for the Nuggets a few seasons ago, in a road game the Spurs would eventually win, despite going 16-25 this season away from home.  Tim Duncan is gone. Manu Ginobili is gone. Tony Parker is decomposing in Charlotte.But Pop, Derrick White, Becky Hammon, 20 years of dignity, a couple of band aids, and the old man games of LaMarcus Aldridge and DeMar DeRozan are still there, and, for a game at least, that was good enough. For the series? We’d still take Denver. 

[3] Portland Trail Blazers vs. [6] Oklahoma City Thunder

Game One:

, Thunder 99

Game Two:

 Thunder at Blazers, 10:30 p.m., Tuesday

Where were you for the Enes Kanter game?The big man, who plays exactly like you’d expect someone who has a warrant issued against him by his home country, put up 20 points and 18 rebounds, all of which were needed in Portland’s five-point Game 1 win, which snapped a 10-game playoff losing streak. Remember: The Blazers got this guy for free in February.  We have a request: Can a smart basketball person tell us why this guy is so unplayable? He sucks at defense, sure. But:

• He has the third-best offensive rebounding percentage of any player in the league 

• Actually looks like he gives a shit

• Is an immaculate LeBron James troll

The big problem for Oklahoma City is how injured Paul George suddenly looks, though they likely would have stolen Game 1 if not for a truly putrid performance from 3-point range as a team (5-of-33).  [LISTEN: Damian Lillard on the playoffs, music, and his rookie moments]

[4] Houston Rockets vs. [5] Utah Jazz

Game One:

, Jazz 90

Game Two:

 Jazz at Rockets, 10:30 p.m., Wednesday

From The Ringer’s winners and losers column: 

• Utah allowed Harden to control the game like it was a yo-yo in his hands; that was its first mistake. The second was simply not producing enough offense to keep up. Utah scored only 44 in the first half and shot 26 percent from deep on the game. 

All of that is true and well said, and also very unsurprising. James Harden finished with an easy 29 points. The Jazz, who use Jae Crowder during crunch-time and Joe Ingles, who finished with three points, as their second most involved offensive player, have a lot to figure out.Though, to be fair, they were blown out by OKC in last year’s first playoff game, too.  [READ: This unorthodox way to guard James Harden is either genius or a fluke]

  Quick Hits

• The Kings, who had their best season by wins and losses since 2008, fired their coach, Dave Joerger, then hired Luke Walton, who was fired by Not Magic Johnson, which completed the most bizarre three-day stretch in a while.

• Who will take over for the Lakers? The favorite is Ty Lue.

• From Reddit: The Magic are the only team in the Eastern Conference that LeBron hasn't beaten in a playoff series. 

• The Golden State Warriors were on 60 Minutes on Sunday. 

• Chuck wants LeBron to join Inside the NBA for the playoffs: 'You ain't got nothing to do!'

• LeBron responded: "Sir Charles, I actually do have a ton going on but I may take you up on your offer. We shall see. LeBron sure is sensitive.