Dec 8, 2023

America 🤝 Tyrese Haliburton

Fri, Dec 8th, 2023   

  The Opening Tip

  • LeBron is timeless

  • Two current losing streaks are flirting with history 

  • Chuck spent last night’s TV coverage roasting everyone

 1. He's Here, He's Perfect 

The best part about the In-Season Tournament is that it has forced America to become acquainted with rising superstar Tyrese Haliburton, who had never played a game on TNT before Monday. 

  • Well, he has how played *two* national TV games. And he has arrived, spectacularly. 

On the court, since Monday: He’s hit two daggers in two games to beat the Celtics and Bucks, respectively, and then mocked Dame Lillard’s Dame Time celebration after the second one. 

  • In those two games, he’s averaging 26.5 PPG and 14 APG with zero turnovers. 

Off the court, he’s perfect too: He wants to make the playoffs because Buddy Hield has never made it there; he takes the IST seriously because he’s never won anything; it ‘means the world’ to him to represent Indiana. 

  • It’s like a lab took into account everything the public hates about the stereotypical modern NBA superstar (so, James Harden), then made a formula and spat out Tyrese Haliburton.

  • He’s an unselfish lead guard who also averages 27 PPG. He loves small markets and takes the regular season seriously. 

TLDR: He’s perfect, and his free-fall in the draft three years ago followed by the trade 1.5 years later will look more confounding by the year.[READ: The In-Season Tournament is giving us a dream finale]

 2. Daily GIFLeBron  

Our official stance as a newsletter leans more toward ‘Let’s make fun of LeBron for getting sonned by Ime Udoka’ than ‘Let’s generically praise LeBron to death,’ but he was incredible last night in the Lakers’ blowout semi-final win over the Pelicans.

 3. Trivia time  

Who has the most NBA seasons leading the league in triple-doubles? (Not the most triple-doubles overall.)Answer at the bottom.

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4. What’s wrong with this picture? 

Hint: The Pelicans were not deducted three points to start the game. 

5. Currently en vogue: Long-ass losing streaks 

On Oct. 28, the Pistons beat the Bulls to go 2-1.On Nov. 2, the Spurs beat the Suns to go 3-2.Neither team has won since, a combined 33 straight losses (18 for Detroit, 15 for San Antonio). 

  • The Pistons have successfully pulled off No-Win November and are working on the same for December. Cade Cunningham has regressed from his rookie year and Monty Williams is actively confusing all of sports media with his lineup choices. 

  • Gregg Popovich has more cringey outbursts at the fans (1) than wins in the last 36 days (0). He also insisted on starting Jeremy Sochan (not a point guard) at point guard until a few days ago, which no one wanted, let alone Sochan. 

FYI: The longest one-season losing streak is 26. The Pistons are eight away. Try and find a win on their schedule.

 6.  Quick Hits 

 7.  Reads 

  • The Rudy Gobert trade suddenly looks genius [SB Nation]

  • The state of basketblogging [Defector]