(The Bucks are doomed)

Wed, April 3rd, 2024

Author

The Grip
April 03, 2024

The Opening Tip

  • Milwaukee is intensely average under Doc Rivers

  • Jalen Green’s athleticism is mind-blowing

  • A Semi Pro-esque moment unfolded last night

Must-watch games

1. Is this sample size big enough?

The Bucks did the unthinkable last night: They lost to the Wizards. The Wizards! 

The loss as -900 favorites got everyone riled up about the Doc Rivers era, which isn’t going so well:

  • Milwaukee is 15-14 since he took over. That’s more than a third of a season's sample size.

  • In that time, the Bucks have the 11th best defense and the 17th best offense. Their net rating is 15th.

  • They are, both by definition and eye test, an average team, despite having a top 5 player and Dame Lillard.  

B.D. (before Doc) … the Bucks were 30-13 and only 3.5 games behind the Celtics. Their offensive was second, their defense was 21st and their net rating was 10th. 

  • They, at least, appeared to have an identity, which was ‘score a bunch and let up slightly less,’ which worked 70% of the time. 

Under Doc, they’re no longer an elite offensive team and haven’t become an elite defensive team.

They may be in ‘wait until playoffs’ mode, but, once they get there, Milwaukee will be going to war with a coach and a player whose playoff resumes outside of one respective ring leave a ton to be desired.

2. Daily GIF: Hang time

(Jalen Green made the shot, too.)

3. Trivia

Nikola Jokic moved into sole possession of third place on Denver’s all-time scoring list on Tuesday night. Who’s first?

• Carmelo Anthony

• Alex English

• Dan Issell

• David Thompson

Guess, click and see if you're right.

4. Peer pressure works

A real-life version of Dukes hitting the Moonshot in Semi Pro played out last night, though this one had a much quicker resolution. 

  • During a ‘Threes for Keys’ giveaway, where a contestant must make three 3-pointers in 30 seconds to win a new car, a fan clearly released and hit his third 3 before the buzzer sounded. 

  • The crowd and the guy went nuts, but the in-game announcer told him it was ‘after the buzzer.’ (A complete lie.)

  • The crowd and the guy immediately started booing, which is very satisfying to watch. 

  • A few minutes later, the Jazz and the car company, clearly realizing they were about to be skewered on social media and in the arena for cheating a normie out of a free car, reversed course and announced he would, in fact, be getting the car.

Just think: Without the omnipresent fear of an online outrage mob ready to mobilize, dox, DM bomb, and generally spread hate at the first sign of any foul play, this Utahn might never have received justice from Ken Garff Automotive Group.

Anyways, second half … coming up next.

Quick hits

  • Victor Wembanyama was this close to a quadruple-double last night. 

  • The difference between 1 and 2 in the East is bigger than 1 and 10 in the West. 

  • In honor of Rajon Rondo retiring, a reminder that he was a pioneer of the absurd triple-double stat lines. 

  • Fuck it, Caitlin Clark highlights. 

  • This was a no-call for Steph Curry.

Reads + Pods

  • Gambling has made ends of games miserable for CBB benchwarmers [The Athletic]

  • Why the MVP race isn’t close as you might think [ESPN]

  • Jrue Holiday’s season of change [The Ringer]

That's the buzzer.
Thanks for reading the 372nd edition of The Grip.